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10 Things Gay Men Should Discuss
Top 10 Things Homosexual Men Should Discuss with Their Healthcare Provider
Following are the health issues GLMAs healthcare providers have identified as most commonly of concern for gay men. While not all of these items apply to everyone, its wise to be aware of these issues.
1. Come Out to Your Primary Healthcare Provider
In order to provide you with the best protect possible, your primary nurture provider should know you are gay. Knowing your sexual orientation and sexual behaviors will help your healthcare provider offer the correct preventative screenings, and order the appropriate tests. If your provider does not seem comfortable with you as a male lover man, find another supplier. You can consult the LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory for support finding a provider.
2. Reducing the Risk of Getting or Transmitting HIV
Many men who have sex with men are at an increased risk of getting HIV, but the ability to prevent the acquisition and transmission of HIV has improved drastically in recent years. If you are living with HIV, anti-HIV medications can aid
Gay Men and Femininity: The Horror
Why are there so many hair stylists who are gay? Why are our homes so often featured in interior blueprint magazines?
Why are we often the tastemakers of the fashion industry?
Why is there an entire décor resale website named “Previously Owned By A Gay Man”?
Is there a exceptional gay “taste” gene yet to be discovered?
Alan Downs, in his popular manual The Velvet Rage, argues that the reason that same-sex attracted men are overrepresented as leaders in these industries is that we’ve had to become masters of hiding. As kids our accurate selves did not get validated, and so we learned to create the appearance of beauty as way to hide our “unbeautiful” selves from the world. “We’re experts in making things and people observe good,” writes Downs.
It’s an interesting theory, and one that would be complicated to prove or disprove. I acquire no idea if it’s true. However, I do reflect The Velvet Rage is the most important book we have on same-sex attracted men’s development.
What I love about the book are the first several chapters where he validates, with hard-hitting language, the challenges of
Many gay men grew up feeling ashamed of not conforming to cultural expectations about “real boys” or “real men.” Especially during middle and high school, they may have been bullied or publicly humiliated because of their difference—made to feel like outsiders and not “one of the boys.” They may have create it easier relating to women than men, though they didn’t fully belong to the miss group, either.
Every gay man I’ve seen in my practice over the years has had a conflicted, troubled relationship with his own masculinity, often shaping his behavior in destructive ways. Writing for Vice, Jeff Leavell captures the dynamic nicely: “Queer people, especially gay men, are recognizable for dealing with a slew of self-doubts and anxieties in noxious ways. Gay men are liable to feel incredibly insecure over their masculinity, a gentle of internalized homophobia that leads them to idolize 'masc 4 masc', 'gaybros' and [to] shame and oppress femme men.”
Here we see one of the most common defenses against shame: getting rid of it by offloading or projecting it onto somebody else; in this case, one
What Gay Men Should Anticipate in a Relationship
Some same-sex attracted men put up with a lot in their relationships. Their long-term partners will aggressively flirt with other men in front of them, go abode with a guy from the bar without any forewarning, sleep with ex-lovers without gaining consent from their current lover, or brag to their current boyfriends about the quality of their sex with strangers. Ouch.
Heres what I find most concerning. Some gay men dont undergo they have a right to be upset about these behaviors. Theyll question me why they perceive so jealous and how can I help them let go of their jealousy. They think that the gay community believes in sexual freedom and it isnt cool or manly to object to their partners sexual behavior.
In other words, they touch shame for experiencing pain by the actions of their long-term partners.
Heterosexual couples get plenty of social support for treating their partners with respect when it comes to sex. Outrage is the characteristic social response when friends are told about poverty-stricken relationship behavior among vertical people. When gay men tell